If Only... I'd done things differently

"I SHOULD HAVE said this",  "IF ONLY I’d done this" 

How often do we catch ourselves saying this?

Whether it’s an embarrassing conversation with someone you like or a job interview that didn’t go well, a sale that you missed or an argument with someone; when something happens in the way we didn’t want it to, it’s easy to sit there and play out all the things we could have said or done differently.

To keep rehashing it over and over from different angles. 

This is isn’t helpful for two reasons
➡️ the first is that if you REALLY could have done it differently in the moment, (with all the thoughts and feelings you were having) you would have. The present ‘you’ is having completely different thoughts and feelings from the you in the middle of the situation, so you can’t compare.
➡️rehashing it and beating yourself up just doubles the pain. You can’t touch the past or change it, it’s happened. But replaying it is a choice.

Instead, take a moment to recognise
1. What happened? How did it make you feel?
2. Is there a way you could have handled the situation better? What did you learn?
3. Now you’ve thought about the past and all you’ve learned from it, it’s time to let go, to focus on the NOW. How will you choose to show up with everything you know now?

We all make mistakes, things happen. Don’t add to your pain by beating yourself up over it, accept it, learn and let go 💛